The Oscars! An Alternative Ballot for 2010

Yet again, my friends and I got together to celebrate the science and art of film.  Okay, we had cocktails, wine, beer, pizza, and dished on the whole thing.  What else are friends for?

It is a tradition that we cast our votes on the traditional Oscar categories plus some amazing alternative questions that are brilliantly composed by the host(s) of the party.  I thought you might get a kick out of these and/or want to spread the tradition.


Oscar® 2010 Supplemental Ballot (with answers)

1. How many time will natural disasters be mentioned?
a. zero (X)
b. 1-2
c. 3-4
d. 5+

2. If Sandra Bullock wins, will she make a self-deprecating remark?
a. Yes (X)
b. No

3. Will anyone be on stage painted blue like in Avatar?
a. Yes (X)
b. No

4. Which host speaks first?
a. Steve Martin (X)
b. Alec Baldwin

5. Mickey Rourke's hair
a. Up
b. Down (alas, n/a this year)

6. How many people will cry on stage? (Note: tears must run down cheeks or be wiped away.)
a. zero (X)
b. one
c. two
d. three
e. four or more

7. Will we get a glimpse of Mo'Nique's unshaved legs during the telecast (not red carpet)?
a. yes
b. no (X)

8. Will Michael Jackson be featured in the "In Memoriam"?
a. Yes (X)
b. No

9. If Mo'Nique or Gaby Sidibe wins, will the camera pan to someone in the audience who has no connection to the actress other than race?
a. Yes (X)
b. No

10. Will any men on stage in a suit or tux be sans necktie?
a. yes (X)
b. no

11. Will either host make a bad joke about James Cameron and Katherine Bigelow being divorced?
a. yes (X)
b. no

12. If Cameron wins best director, whom does the camera pan to after Cameron?
a. Bigelow
b. Cast member
c. Other nominee (n/a this year)

13. Will anyone mention Susan Sarandon and vomit?
a. yes
b. no (X)